Thursday, June 29, 2006

Oleg Saprykin again spotted in Boston


Oleg Saprykin, the enigmatic winger who remains on holdout from the Boston Bruins, has once again been spotted at the team's training facility.

Saprykin, recently cleared of all charges stemming from his faked-death incident, continues to refuse to give interviews, but his new agent, Peyton Douglas, reported to NBC-WGBH that Saprykin was merely engaging in some "visiting of friends and light skating, to maintain his multi-million dollar skills".

When asked what this return meant to negotiations, GM Joshua Anderson claimed to know nothing of the sorts. "We have expressed to Nadeau Sports Management that we will not return to negotiations until Oleg has been examined by a mental health professional. Given his near death experience, and the subsequent actions of evading authorities, friends, and family, we question whether Sapry is in a state to return to the ice. Will he be, like Pink sang, a hazard to himself? If so, we may shy away from that liability. Will he be an missile of doom and destruction to the opponents? Then we're willing to talk. Will he be the same Sapry from last year? Then we need to consider these things. It's all subjective to that evaluation."

When told of Peyton Douglas, the new agent for Saprykin, Anderson unleashed a string of profanities often seen in this reporter's favorite pub, but rarely in a professional setting. Anderson clammed up at that point, saying only he was disappointed that Saprykin chose to change representation.

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