Jurcina off to camp

Concerned over the strength of one of their top defensive prospects, the Providence Bruins, after consultation with the parent club, have enrolled Milan Jurcina in the upcoming Strength Class. The player, pictured at right, has found himself on the wrong end of many hits lately, and when he has gone to deliver what he calls "bone crushing blows", he more often than not finds himself on his ass.

Boston Bruins GM Joshua Anderson, in town to deliver the news to Jurcina, addressing the situation, allegedly telling him that the team had full confidence in his abilities, and definitely believed he had the overall capabilities to ascend to the next level.

"As a star of our system," Anderson said, "Milan can not be allowed to continue to be the proverbial ninety-eight pound weakling, with sand in his eyes and the pumped up jock walking off with his girl into the sunset. As such, we think it is appropriate we start sending him to training camps in the hopes of elevating his play. We want him to be pumped up about the opportunity this will afford him, and consider it a sign of our dedication to him as an important piece of our long-term plans as an organization."

The camp, held in conditions that many find to be both intimidating and imposing, focuses on the overall strength and well-being. While improving mass is one portion, it will also teach Milan that with great strength comes great responsibility. Hopefully, upon his return, he can also reign in some of his wildness. If not - at least he will be stronger to win some of those fights he keeps taking to a draw.