Bruins leave table

As negotiations continued with Bruins free agent holdout Oleg Saprykin and his agent, Bruins General Manager Joshua Anderson was seen storming away from The Bobby Orr Room in the upper tier of the Fleet Center.

While Anderson would not comment to one reporter who passed him in the hallway, a caterer of the event said that Anderson "said he had to poop and left the room in a rush. In fact, he unleashed a string of profanities unheard since Lucifer himself was cast out from heaven as he tried to pull open the door, though everyone should know it is clearly marked 'Push'. Some people, you know?"

Saprykin's agent, a representative of the Nadeau Agency, issued a statement which read, "In the course of our informal gathering amongst friends, Mr. Anderson and myself began to discuss the contract status of Oleg. When I mentioned we may be willing to reduce our years request in return for increase in bonus dollars, Anderson informed me I was a 'damned fool!' and stormed from the room. Any story about an irrational bowel movement is just that - a story. The Bruins are attempting to play hardball, and Oleg and his management team have shown that they are more than willing to sit on the sidelines as long as need be. How long are the Bruins prepared to go without a player of his quality?"

In response, Anderson released a photo of his poop from the third floor stall.