Rangers GM Gaurantees Victory Over Canes

"Their streak is over."

Despite the large gap in the standings, his teams spotty play, a host of new player arrivals, and the fact that the Carolina Hurricanes have only lost three times in 24 games Rangers GM Burns said he is 100% confident his team will win tonight.

Burns even went so far as to supply a picture to the paper and then proceeded to explain it.


"See the guy on the right? That's the New York Rangers. See the guy on the left with no face? That's the Hurricanes. Why does he have no face? Because we've beaten it off. The Hurricanes are going to experience that tonight. This team has had an easy schedule and a lot of luck. Tonight we beat them so bad we break their spirit. They'll won't even make the playoffs. We'll beat them like a rented mule. We're going to drop them like a bad transmission. We're going to roll them out like wholesale carpeting. We're going to mess them up like... Tina Turners hair. We're going to snap them like a finger... no...well.... you get what I mean. Their weaknesses will be exposed like a Jackson's breast at a superbowl!"

"Take it to the bank baby!"